Blast From The Past

Was talking to a friend of mine who was asking me about personal statements. That made me backtrack, and so I went through all my documents, all my folders, only to find that some important documents and pictures were deleted from my hard disc on my old DELL when it got infected by a virus.

So I went through my old e-mails hoping to have saved something in my UCAS application e-mails but no dice.

And then one by one I found all those application e-mails. To the University of Edinburgh. To the University of Nottingham. To the University of Liverpool. How close I was all those years ago. If only we had the money and if only someone had told me a year earlier to sit for my BMAT.

I'd probably be in my 4th year of medical school now. Halfway through perhaps. Studying with international students from all over the world. Traveling. Experiencing all the things I've ever wanted. Re-visiting all the places, all the countries I went to as a child.

Seeing all those old e-mails suddenly made me so, so sad.

So sad because it's always been a dream of mine to study medicine in the UK. Ever since I can remember.

So very sad.

But then again if I had gone abroad I probably wouldn't be the same person typing out this blog post.

I wouldn't have met all the crazy characters (good and bad) I met along the way. I suppose I'd have gone through other experiences. 

Terribly upsetting, yes, but I'm still doing the course I've always wanted to do. So that's something, eh?

I still got to live away from home. I still got to travel and experience different things, different people. I broke, I fixed myself up, I brushed myself off, I stood back up again. I learned how to cook, how to see to the car, how to see to my own place, how to have fish without killing them, how to know whom to socialize with and whom to stay the hell away from. 

I learnt that whatever it is you feel is based on your mindset and mentality. If you want to be happy, it's up to you to make it happen. Nobody is going to do things for you. Even if they do it's never for free anyway.

I learnt how to appreciate my parents and my friends. I learnt that not everything will last. I learnt how to love unconditionally. I learnt how to stay focused and disciplined and that not all car accidents can be hidden from your parents especially if there's insurance involved.

These past 4 years have been bittersweet. 

Much sweeter now, though.

I don't know what plans God has for me, but I hope studying in the UK is one of them. Eventually.