Skip to main content

Burnout

These past 2 weeks have been somewhat...weird for me, to say the least.
Have been feeling really down.
Last weeks crazy shit schedule, I think, is still taking its toll on me.
I'm completely exhausted.
All I want is a day or two to rest and recuperate before I continue.
There's this voice at the back of my head saying I can't go on like this.
It's like I want so much to quit what I'm doing and move on to something else. Something that'll let me have a life.
But of course that's not an option. 
Quitting is never an option but sometimes I can't help but to think about it, ya know?
Medicine is all I've ever wanted to do, aside from journalism for a short period of time when I was doing my A Levels. 
Whatever it is, though, I can't see myself doing anything else.
Recently I've been thinking about being an air hostess lol. Traveling the world, seeing places, meeting people. 
Travel. Because I adore it.
But for how long will I adore being in different parts of the world every couple of days? It'll be a temporary high.
I think medical school was designed to break us in such a way that we eventually learn how to fix ourselves up again through other people.
So many thoughts running through my head.
Can't seem to turn all these channels off.
Things I want, I cannot have.
People I want, I cannot have.
It's frustrating.
So frustrating.
But that's life, isn't it?

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Table Topics: Judgement & Understanding

Took one of my classmates out today coz she needed to get some things. She's been through a lot. Nothing I will disclose here but we had a pretty long chat in the car once we got back. And it's really true what they say about never judging someone before getting to know them. She opened up to me about everything that was going on. How she felt about things. How she was dealing with things. And at the end of the day it all boils down to understanding. There's a reason behind the things people do. It's simply a matter of accepting that reason and understanding them for it and them helping them get through it. You hear stories about married couples going through a divorce. It's really not an option anyone should think about after marriage. After all it's for better or for worse, right? But what if sometimes it becomes too much to bear? What if sometimes things get impossible to handle? What if that's the reason divorces happen in the first plac...
2 comments
Read more

To Date.

I've recently been nominated for the Liebster Blog Award thanks to a friend of mine I've only known via Facebook for some years now. The blog post for that is still being drafted. I've been posed some pretty tricky questions /;) Haven't been blogging as frequently as I used to coz I didn't bring my laptop back home this time round. Didn't think I'd have much use for it. Things have been a little...crazy here to say the least. I'm actually twenty-one now. Though I must say, the word 'freedom' was never synonymous with this age. All I ever related to this milestone was responsibility. Funny. It's been such a rollercoaster ride of emotions. I could never completely describe it. I've been thinking about how I've celebrated my birthdays all these years. Two birthdays I celebrated away from home. My eighteenth, which was in the UK with Aunty M and Uncle T, and my twentieth, which was in Johor with my classmates and a once...
2 comments
Read more

Of Ends & New Beginnings

Eleven months ago I was about 20% suicidal. A lot has happened since then. Graduated just three days ago. It was really very emotional for me because I never really thought I'd make it this far. I'm actually a doctor now can you believe it? Many years ago I wrote something about myself that I felt made perfect sense. & it really has this past year; "If anyone were to fall for me, I daresay it wouldn't be for my looks, but rather the way they get to be themselves when they're with me." I have learnt so many things this year. A lot more than I have in a while. I've learnt not to judge anyone solely on the way they look, because even the ones most displeasing to the eyes have qualities about them which you cannot help but to love and admire. If anything, or if something is meant for you, you will have it somehow. You may have to walk through hell and back to get it, but it will be yours for the taking if that's what God has decided...
Post a Comment
Read more